So they had installed condom vending machines to reduce the spread of AIDS. Initially people were quite wary of spending and expected them as complimentary gifts. They broke open the machines, took away as much they needed. But that carried grave risks coupled with limited supply. They sought privileged access. Turns out some eager chaps have taken the vending machines home!

Imagine what happens next:

He: “Look babe, what did I get! Lets get ready *blushing*”

She: “Oh wow! But dah’ling… this requires us to put in coins every time we need a pack”

He: “Darn… do we have any coins here?”

She: “Hell no… what are we going to do now?”

He: “I know what we’ve to do… pay-phones… let me go get a few! I’ll be right back, and then we’ll… *blushes more* … happily ever after!”

All ye policemen and municipalitymen, if you’re reading this, you know where to look for your condomaniac-turning-phonomanic! And for those who’ve still not taken any lessons, act now. Better safe than sorry — there’s still quite a few machines out there.